Oh Noes.

I remember another long ago ED reference. When I was in my sophomore year of High school, I remember I would tell my mom I "forgot" to eat dinner or something. It was something I forgot to do quite frequently. Hm. Interesting.

Last night we went to Paula's sister's house to drink. It was fun. Jordan brought his super cute boyfriend. :D I had: 2 Appletinis. 1 Cosmo. 1 shot of Goldschlager, and 2 soy milk mix things. It had about a shot and a half of Kahlua each, and another shot of vodka, then that was doubled with soy milk. It was pretty good.
I also had 2 more FULL bags of baked lays, pretty much to myself. I wanted to puke soooo bad. Ugh. Partially vomit and partially food.
I wanted to punch Ella in the face the whole fucking time. I almost bitched her out a few times. WHY AM I SO ANGRY? Like, ALL the time? She's so fucking needy! And she just STARED at me. Judging me. Yeah, I drank a lot. Yes, I was the most intoxicated. You've been there a HELL of a lot more than me. And at least I didn't hit on anyone! If it was her, she would have been all over Paula again, and probably Sam too. Well, she's all over him anyway.
It's just painful. She hits on him, like CONSTANTLY, but he likes her hot friend. He tries to be nice and refuse all of her advances politely, but she just can't take a hint. It's painful.
I ate too much at lunch. Anything for lunch is too much.

I'm really worried about my best girl friend, Mykell. She's 2 years younger than me. Today I was talking to her on facebook, because I'm going to be home next weekend and we're going to hang out. The topic turned to how much weight I've lost, and she said she was 130-135 lbs, but she wants to be "skinnier. A lot skinnier." It worries me. I passed my weight loss off as the gym access and going vegan. I don't know if she bought it.

What's worse? I don't know how I feel about it. I'm worried, yes. Do I want her to stop eating? Do I want to encourage or discourage this? ARGH. I WANT TO DISCOURAGE IT! But at the same time, I want someone there with me through everything. I want someone I know to talk about it to. Ugh. Now I just feel terrible. I don't want ANYONE to have this! But then I start thinking, well she isn't as strong as me. It's not going to get her as much as it got me. She'll be able to get out of it.
I'm a terrible, terrible, selfish person. She's so pretty as she is! I told her she was perfect and she didn't need to lose any weight! She's so pretty! I don't think she believed me though.
If I was her, what would change my mind?

Nothing. Nothing could stop me.
ARGH!

Here's a picture I edited today. I'm getting behind. What would you wish for?