Another day? Why not.

I'll just start this one now. I'll keep updating it until tomorrow night, no worries lovies. = ]

I just had an argument with a friend, who says I don;t know what it's like to be alone.
Are you kidding me? I don't know what it's like.
Cause, YEAH. Rejection is SO MUCH worse than breakups. Mhmmm. It's one thing when you get denied by someone you dont know. When it's someone you feel like you've known forever? Someone you love more than ANYONE else ever? And even after they've left you, no one cares. No one. There is no one to talk to, and you sit alone for days not eating. Not sleeping. Not even energy enough to cry anymore. You just SIT there, and try no to remember how much you hurt, because when you do, your insides tear apart and you feel like you're dying, which sounds like a pretty awesome thing.

Mmmhmm. Not as bad. Whatever.

I'm pretty much saying fuck this paper...

I was talking to the Republican guy I work with. He wants to party with me this weekend. Haha
I told him I wasnt planning on drinking friday, but I'd think about it.
Then he signed off with a "goodnight beautiful." What the hell does that mean? he WAS pretty drunk. That's probably it.

I'm gonna post some more hot men and food porn pictures on PT before I sign off for the night.
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144.0 this morning.
FUCK.
ITS NOT FUCKING LOW ENOUGH.
It's tuesday.
Prom is on Saturday.

I NEED TO FIT INTO MY DRESS. FUCK.
GOD DAMN IT.
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5:58.
Went tanning. Got back. Skipping dinner.
I texted the cute guy I met about coffee tomorrow and He never replied. It's been 5 hours.

FUCk. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK.
That BITCH is coming up tomorrow instead of Saturday.
WHAT THE FUCK.
Oh yeah, she has no job now. She got fired. FROM WALMART. BAHAHAHAHAHA

UGH. BUT SHES COMING UP TOMORROW.
How humiliating. I'm still WAYYY to fat. UGH.
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK.

I'm so mad at myself right now. I'm gonna go bruise.

I swear to god. I'm going to do everything I can to get her kicked off campus.

I'm so fucking sick of everything.
I'm sick of being cold.
Im sick of being sick.
I'm sick of being fat.
I'm sick of being here.
I'm sick of being alive.
I'm sick of fasting.
I'm sick of my hurting teeth.
I'm sick of competing with everyone.
I'm sick of faking it.
I'm sick of being sad.
I'm sick of being depressed.
I'm sick of not being able to cry.

I'm just sick of it. All of it.

I want to bawl right now. And then cut. Then cry some more.
72 hours of fasting down.
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12 PM

Fricken Elle is playing music in my room.
I don't even care anymore. I'm just apathetic.
I dont care about anything. I just want to sit here.

143.6 after showering.

Breakfast:
1 small glass of apple juice
2 glasses of diet coke.
1 glass of [heated up] chocolate soy milk.

Lunch:
3 diet coke
1 choc soy milk.

Dinner:
2 cups of tea.