I havent weighed myself in about a week.

I'm terrified. I've been binging all week.

My ex is single again. He cheated on me with my best friend and has been seeing her for almost a year now. I have no idea why they broke up.
I don't know how I feel about this. I think its going to be another trigger.

At first I laughed. Stupid stupid people. She moved three hours away to be with him, got a job and an apartment, severed ties with her family. And now its over. Hah. Dumb bitch.

But what does it mean? Why?
He deleted me off facebook a few months ago. Childish, I know. But what do I do if he wants to start talking to me again?

I don't know. I have no idea and I don't want to think about it right now.

I'm so tired.

I want to cut so bad right now.
I want to take a few bottles of pills and cut my body all over and then go to bed.

I've eaten an obscene amount. I have tomorrows intake all planned out. I'm not checking the scale until Sunday morning.

I told the guy I like that I had feelings for him. He doesn't feel the same.

I got my first driving ticket today. It was for a seatbelt violation. Fml.

Working all weekend. Ill update when I can.